Let me conform but treat me differently
By Rajesh Setty on Mon 24 Nov 2008, 1:07 AM – 2 Comments
Everyone is unique. You are unique. I am unique too. We both know that.
The sad story is that rather than capitalizing on that uniqueness, many will struggle to conform to what’s around them. But with the same vigor, they want to be treated differently too.
That leads to a complex situation, a dilemma actually – there is a need to the same in the eyes of the members of a group but at the same time there is a need to “stand out from the crowd” from members outside the group (and may be even from members within the group)
How do you break out of the stalemate situation?
By remembering that the while the group likes conformity what it requires more is “value” to the group. If you can provide “significant value” to the group, a bit of non-conformity is forgiven. If you bring no value to the group, conformity alone won’t get you extra points.
You “stand out” not just because you want to stand out but because of the “value” you bring to the group. Unfortunately, you can’t wish to “stand out” – you have to act!
Have a great week ahead!
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Posted in the Leadership category.


2 Comments so far, Add Yours
Martyna on February 3rd, 2010
sometimes true standing out brings great value, quite many people do not realize that it is possible to create a unique behavior
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Kare Anderson on November 25th, 2008
An unfortunate and counter-intuitive behavior in seeking conformity in a group is to take a stand on the outer edge of it – via an opinion.
That effect is described in several studies and the recent book, The Big Sort.
The net effect is to make groups more extreme over time – and make a culture (club, community, country, etc.) more polarized.